The Home Of Weird And Ignorance: SCRIPTS: Bubbles The Ninja's Great Adventure 1.5

Monday, 2 May 2011

SCRIPTS: Bubbles The Ninja's Great Adventure 1.5

WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY: Gavin Drury

PREVIOUSLY: After the wreckage explosion on the beach, everyone seems to be ok. In order to find out where they are they start organising a search party for the pilot and the cockpit when something suddenly emerges from the jungle.

SAYID: We'll have to send a search party out. Three or four of us to go look for him at least as we don't know what sort of whacky adventures we could get into searching for him.

JACK: Well I'll go. Fortunately I've had experience with exploring and if the pilot needs any medical treatment I'll be able to help.

Suddenly something emerges from the jungle....

.....20 years ago.....

SCENE: There's a group of kids hanging around in the playground at school.

ROBERT: Jack, I'm telling you, Steve said he found a stash of porn in the middle of the woods but he's not telling anyone where it is.

PAUL: Yeah we should go out and look for it.

FRED: I agree. But we can't let Steve find out.

JACK: Well if all of us go at the same time, he might notice we're all gone and suspect something. Just a few of us should go.

JOHN: And the others can cover while the rest are gone.

ROBERT: Who's going to go look though, has anybody had any experience with exploring?

JACK: Well I used to be a champion explorer and I'm quick too.

GAVIN:I'll stay here and cover for you. Not sure whether I'd be up for all that exploring. Sounds a bit too energetic.

ANDREW: What d'you say Gav?

GAVIN: I said I'll stay here and cover for you. Not sure whether I'd be up for all that exploring. Sounds a bit too much like hard work.

ANDREW:.....What? You're going back under cover because the weather's boring and doing some school work?......OK, that sounds like Gav's staying behind then.

JACK: Well obviously I'm going and I'll take Steve and Fred with me. With my champion exploring abilities, we'll find it in no time.

.....12 years ago.....

JACK: come on lads. He's almost ready, we should be out of the launch cannon and into the welcome lounge any minute.

JAKE: Last one to the egg, well, is just as useless as the second one to it.

JACOB: I'm so getting there first this time, i've greased myself up for less friction this time.

JOHN: Not if I'vvvvvvvv..........whooaa!!!!!!!

All the sperm are shot out at high velocity and come to rest inside a dark cavern.

JACOB: That's it guys, I'm off. See you at the egg losers.

MACK: Follow him, don't let him get away.

JOHN: It's too late, he's out of sight already.

JACK: Lads?

JAKE: Why are you smiling Jack?

JACK: Look, up there.

MACK: Fuck man, we're miles off.

JACK: Don't worry lads, I was prepared for this, I've brought a map. I'll get us to the egg in no time. I know a route.

.....later.....

All the sperms are trying to gain entry to the egg except for Jack who's fiddling in his backpack.

JOHN: You not trying to get in Jack?

JACK: All in good time.

JOHN: You'll never beat any of us to it like this.

JACK: Wanna bet? Told you I came prepared this time.

Jack pulls a cordless drill from his backpack and grins.
.....back on the island.....

SAYID: We'll have to send a search party out. Three or four of us to go look for him at least as we don't know what sort of whacky adventures we could get into searching for him.

JACK: Well I'll go. Fortunately I've had experience with exploring and if the pilot needs any medical treatment I'll be able to help.

Suddenly something emerges from the jungle....

.....to be continued.....

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VO: Next time....on Swollen Vengeance.